MrTeddy
by FreezingValentine
Summary: It seems that Sephiroth has some unresolved issues, and this with the most unexpected of things! Too bad Genesis has no idea... Humor/Crack fic


Disclaimer: I, of course, do not own the characters or **the game** they come from. And all you who just lost (points at self, for one) I apologize and laugh in an evil manner at the same time.

**-Mr. Teddy Bear-**

The almighty general was on a very important mission as of the moment his PHS went off. Flipping it shut but a moment after the content of the message registered in his mind, he turned on his heel causing his famous leather coat to whip around dramatically, somehow synched with his long silver tresses that were also included in his famous attributes.

With long strides he crossed the battlefield and headed over to the vehicles, giving the orders to bring him back to Midgar as fast as was humanly possible. The soldiers, feeling something was up, did not spend any time arguing, more due to the fact they treasured their lives than any sort of negligence of duty.

So it was with high speed they returned the silver general to the capital and the ShinRa headquarters. Sephiroth spent no time on trivialities such as informing those at the top of his early return, rather opting to use the loophole to take care of personal business.

Business which had him hurrying back in the first place.

Never letting up on his pace once he exited the car he strode inside the building and straight over to the elevators. Heading the long way up to a very familiar floor where he exited and walked down the short hallway to an equally familiar door which opened at the swipe of his multifunctional card.

Entering a certain redhead's domain was always an interesting experience. You never knew what would greet you as the occupant tended to be eccentric to the letter and highly unpredictable at times. Whether it be a sudden firaga, offending manuscript or the redhead himself coming bounding, it always was as much of a surprise.

One may think you'd get used to it after a couple of years in the man's company, but that assumption was as far off as could be. Genesis Rhapsodos had this odd quirk of finding new ways to surprise one whether you anticipated it or not.

This time at least, Sephiroth had thought he'd already seen the worst and would be able to keep a straight face no matter what he was greeted with, but he was only once more reminded of the very absolute law of Genesis surprising whoever visits his territory.

For behold, as he walked into the redhead's living room in search of said redhead, he found a heap of wrapping paper and what was presumably gifts stacked on the table and strewn over the floor surrounding the couch.

That in itself wasn't an all too unfamiliar sight, but what was sprawled out on the couch beneath the wrapping was. There in all his sleeping glory lay the commander, an arm tucked beneath his head and the other wrapped loosely around a brown, soft looking object in the shape of a bear.

Now, to say that the silver general was surprised was the truth, but more to the point was that he actually showed a resemblance of the emotion on his face, which was a sight rarely seen. His eyes seemed to have decided to live a life of their own – which was _ridiculous!_ – as they repeatedly opened and closed in rapid succession.

Following the initial stupefication, that the general would deny ever occurred if asked, was a sort of loss of direction as he didn't know which way to turn in this situation. Turn around and act like this never happened could possibly be the most beneficial as his fiery friend would most likely refrain from using his materia against him out of embarrassment.

But he did have business with the man, so that option was clinically out of the question. Then remained the option of waking the redhead from his slumber, which was simply a bad idea.

Before a third plan of action could formulate in the general's mind, he was distracted by a shift on the couch. Genesis had shifted slightly in his sleep, overthrowing the rustling papers claiming his legs and for some unfathomable reason tightened his grip on the stuffed animal.

Now holding the bear hugged to his chest, his nose almost buried in it, he made quite an adorable sight. Or, he had made that had not the very offending teddy been seemingly looking at him with those black beady eyes.

It was as though they were mocking him, silently gloating about their positions. All of this was of course ridiculous to the degree where it wasn't even funny. Teddy bears, nor any other type of stuffed animal as far as Sephiroth was aware, mocked people.

Having come to this extraordinarily conclusion of pure genius standards, you'd think he would be satisfied. Far from it.

To the great warrior's aggravation, the feeling of wanting to throttle the thing did not disappear. He was just as offended by the mere existence of the teddy as he was the moment he saw it in his friend's loving embrace.

He realized he was being irrational, something he blamed three nights without sleep and two days on the battlefield for, but even that didn't help him with his teddy bear-issues. It didn't exactly help that the bear in question had a wide embroidered smile that looked very smug at the angle Sephiroth was seeing it.

In fact, Sephiroth was just contemplating whether he'd somehow get in trouble should he murder the stuffed animal for the records named "Mr. Teddy" when Genesis woke up.

"…Seph? What are you doing here?" He asked groggily while pushing himself up. Sephiroth had the sensibility to not smile victoriously when the teddy fell out of the redheads grip onto the floor, but he mentally admitted that it was a feat worthy of praise. Instead, he answered the redheaded commander's question.

"You sent me an urgent message telling me to hurry back. I hoped that you if anyone would know why I'm here." He answered in monotone and Genesis scowled at him.

"Don't be such a smartass." The comment and scowl was softened by a yawn before the redhead seemingly out of nowhere sprung to his feet and bounced past the slightly surprised general.

"I remember now why I asked you to come. But first some coffee. I'm dying from lack of energy here." He threw the sentence over his shoulder as he headed into his kitchen, his tone and behavior in general saying something else about the energy question, but Sephiroth refrained from commenting.

He was busy, after all. He kneeled down and picked the teddy up by the scruff and held it up so he could inspect it. It was less offending now that it was keeping its paws of his friend, but that didn't make him like it anymore than he would a leech.

"Hey, hurry up and get in here! I've got important things to say!" The ever attention craving redhead called from the other room and it broke the silver haired man from his thoughts. Giving the offending abomination in his hand a last glance he nonchalantly let it fall to the floor with a low thud before he left with dignified steps to hear what the important things consisted of this time.

* * *

><p>AN: And the end (for now)! So, it seems like Sephiroth has some Teddy-issues… or for those who love yaoi, some jealousy issues. Of course he would never admit openly to either of them.

I have plans to continue this, trying to make him come to terms with his problems...Genesis being all so helpful. Would that be of interest perhaps? Would love to hear what you think of this oh so silly brainfart. (Even if you are stuck up and hate me for making fun of the almighty Sephiroth-sama)


End file.
